Obese Gamer, Boogie2988, Finds Love

Most of my posts are practical, task oriented, do this, do that- get shit done sort of approach.  This post is more like an RSD Tyler type of post where I am just free flowing my thoughts.

I don't talk about it much these days but I used to be a hardcore gamer (still am).  Played over 10,000 games of Starcraft, had a level 95 Paladin from Diablo 2, played a few thousand games of Heroes of Newerth, a few thousand hours of Team Fortress Classic and Team Fortress 2 along with huge list of other games.

Occasionally, I still watch gaming videos on YouTube.  I came across this video and WOW, strong FEELS in this one.  I was trying to stay alpha but it brought a tear to my eyes.  I thought I had a rough childhood with physical Asian parents who were never satisfied with my achievements and also never having any friends back in high school.  I am not anywhere near this guy!  Once I started doing pickup and saw success, I realized I was just being a little bitch and I didn't have it that bad.  I would say the same applies to my students.  I have had a few hard cases but no one comes near this guy.

Anyway watch the video:

He ends up marrying this girl... not bad!

Yay, happily ever after.  Now lets tie this back into pickup.  Here we have a morbidly obese guy, marrying what you would consider a very attractive girl.  If assessing purely on looks, the guy hit the jackpot.  You could say looks don't matter.  Well yes and no.  What people don't realize is that girls value different traits and assign different levels of importance to them.  Every girl is different.

To some girls, being funny is very important but having a six pack is not.  To some girls, money is important, but personality is not.  To some girls, its more important to have a strong common interest above all else.  I think when people refer pickup as a numbers game, it means that there are certain probabilities of girls who value certain traits over other traits.  Now, certain qualities are more universal than others for example most girls like fit bodies than fat bodies.  I have actually met girls who have chubby fetishes and have literally told me that I didn't have the body type for them.  Although the percentages of the general population with chubby fetishes are small, they still exist, and its still a numbers game where I had the disadvantage for that particular set.  When she told me that, I was like WTF!?  Some times I would play the worst game possible and the girl would magically love me for no reason.  Some times I would play phenomenally solid game, be with the girl for 2 hours and I don't get a call back the next day.  I would still recommend you play solid game all the time, but some times girls would randomly like you.

I have seen many of this guy's videos and I would consider him a funny mother fucker.  He is also a very avid gamer so he is probably respected among his peers as well as having a huge fan base.  I would assume that his girl values humor and common interest above sheer physical aesthetics.

So in theory, you COULD be yourself, not change anything at all... and still get girls (assuming you have a few positive traits).  Is it optimal against the general population?  Absolutely not.  You may ask... how does this guy cope with his disadvantages and highlight his strengths?  The answer is simple.  Hes got 2 million fucking subscribers on YouTube.  Even if 1% of his viewers were females, that would still be 20,000 females.  And if only 1% had a fetish for funny chubby guys, he would STILL have 200 girls potentially interested in him.

Now, I'm not telling you all to get 2 million subscribers in hopes of finding girls, but what I am telling you is that having common interest is a strong way to meet people.  Furthermore, finding a means to reach out to girls is also very important.  I have had students who can't approach worth shit but are able to meet a ton of girls because of what they do.  One guy teaches acrobatic yoga.  His authoritative position plus the fact hes always hands on with the girls lets him get dates really easily.  I have other students who are artists and musicians.  I don't even need to explain for you to figure out why this helps them get girls.

Cold approach is still the bread and butter, the holy grail of learning this stuff.  It lets you make mistakes with no consequence.  It forces you plow through bitchy girls and strike conversations with girls who absolutely don't want to have anything to do with you.  However, once you start getting decent with cold approach and you're seriously trying to find the right girl, there are more efficient and better means than approaching purely random chicks from clubs.  Seriously, I am so sick of pretending to be interested in chicks who work in retail and chicks who study psychology, communication, sociology.  Shoot my brain please.

Don't Be That Pickup Guy

Pickup isn't Crossfit okay?  You don't fucking tell everybody that you're doing it.  Its taboo and nobody outside of pickup will understand you.  Don't try to convince your non-pickup friends to approach with you.  Don't tell your friends.  And for fucks sake, don't tell chicks you're doing it.  They are all going to hold you back, and pickup is hard enough as it is, stop wasting time and energy convincing people otherwise.

Funny story, last weekend. I was with a student in a 1on1.  We ended up pulling these 2 girls to go hang out with us after the club.  One girl was 25ish, and the other girl was 35ish (older coworker of the younger girl).  I asked how their day in Vegas was and they told me a story about this one guy who got her number early in the day during the pool party.  They told me how the guy was "normal" at first, but when he got the number, he started being weird and tried to force kiss them.   When they rejected him, he started bragging that he was a PUA and that he knew Mystery in person.  Pretending to be dumb, I asked the two girls who he was.  They said... you know that guy from the show a few years back, the "The Pickup Artist?".  I was like "Oh".  Then the girl said "is that guy going to NEG me now?  Oh God".

Deep down I am chuckling inside.  First of all, no girl gives a shit you know Mystery, and second of all, having a pickup persona doesn't make you cool.  It is quite common for guys to develop this once their approach anxiety has diminished and they start seeing some success.  The second a girl knows you're actively trying to pick her up, her guard is going to go up.  If she knows you're systematically doing this to a ton of girls, its pretty much game over.

Even for me, I had to learn some of this the hard way.  Although I thank everything I learned from pickup and it has enriched my life in so many ways.  The fact I keep so much of my life online, it has come to bite me in the ass many times over.  When I quit my engineering job and moved to Vegas full time, sometimes I would tell girls what I really did.  Some didn't believe me and others were fascinated and wanted to know all the details but the vibe didn't feel right.  Eventually I just went back to telling girls I was an engineer.

I have had countless people that I really like end up finding about my YouTube channel and blog and ultimately end up never talking to me again.  Sadly but true, when a girl starts to like you, she will start getting real nosy and try to find out what you're all about and start Googling you.  Since my stuff is blasted so deep across the internet, I wonder if I can ever get married one day.  Who ever that girl is, she better really open minded.  Anyways, learn from my mistakes.  Keep your pickup endeavors a secret...unless you can make millions off YouTube like SimplePickup.

Direct vs. Indirect

This topic has been debated probably hundreds of times and its DIRECT vs. INDIRECT.  If you know a bit of history, most of early pickup stuff was predominantly Indirect.  In a few years following, there was a surge in popularity for Direct Game.  You probably know the arguments for both.

Direct Game

• More risk, more reward
• More authentic
• Faster escalation
• Saves time

Indirect Game

• You can't do direct game in social circle because it will make you a weirdo
• You can't do direct game in work settings or certain situations that would make it inappropriate
• Direct game doesn't work on HB10's and the really hot girls because they been hit on so many times.

I think its stupid when people fight over which is better.  There is no such thing.  Ultimately what is better depends on your current skill level and also your sticking points.  Generally speaking, most beginners have issues with flirting, showing intent, and putting themselves on the line.  Its a common sticking point for most beginners.   Direct game is hands down the best way to start for complete beginners.  It helps fix a lot of initial issues most beginners face and also, direct openers gives you harsher blowouts.  The harder the blowout, the faster you numb yourself, and the quicker you can get out of your head, and the faster your approach anxiety fades.  Eating rejections is the path to getting better.  Beginners who start out indirect tend to learn it incorrectly.  The girls can sense that they want something else and therefore the girls get the creepy vibe... when they feel someone has a different intention than they are projecting.  Furthermore, guys who start learning pickup with indirect have a very hard time transitioning from platonic to sexual.  This is why so many early guys in The Game did indirect for up to 18 months before they finally started getting lays (don't quote me I heard this from other people).

On the flip side, if you been going out for a long time and you get results and all you do is direct sexual openers and you are blatantly pissing off 95% of the girls by clawing, picking up, and doing the hand of god to every person in the club...you should start practicing indirect!

Some additional thoughts:
Obviously, you should learn both and ultimately, pickup is a numbers game.  If you're in Vegas and all you're doing is trying to get laid, then sure, go ahead and screen hard for the girls who want sex, go direct, and escalate hard.  But I will tell you this... its not going to work on every girl... especially if shes not attracted to you.  Direct openers will almost immediately blow you out if shes not feeling it or if shes a really hot bitchy girl.   If someone put a gun to your head and told you that you had one shot to approach and get that girl, your best best is to open indirect.

So You Got a Number But You Forgot Who It Is...

Ever get so many numbers you have no idea who that person is?  This happens to me all the time.  I open so many sets that its almost a blur.  I pretty much will forget any girl who I spend less than 30 minutes with.  Well chances are she has a Facebook account.  I don't know why I just found this out today but you can enter their phone number in Facebook search and if they have a Facebook account, it will show their profile.

Great for those of you jackasses who always forget their names or even what they look like but don't have the button cam like me to record every little detail of the interaction :)